Topic Title: 5 months in
| |  "5 months in"
, Thu 8 Sep 20:05
April 2005 brought me a breakdown. I was 27 years old.
I was not prepared for what happened to me. I had a wonderful job, a wonderful outlook on life, and a great group of friends and family. I don't know why I woke up on a Monday and felt like I had died.
What started out as severe anxiety kept me in bed with an inability to even voice what was happening to me. I was rolling around like a madwoman, and I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, I couldn't even speak. I had suffered mild anxiety since I was 22, but this was something different. I gradually isolated myself from everyone that I loved (I didn't understand the meaning of love anymore) stopped doing the things that I enjoyed, and wished I could die. I had no ability to FEEL anything anymore.
After a few weeks, I started taking SJW, Blackmores Brand. I have been taking these since the end of April. Religiously. 3 times a day with food.
Within a few weeeks, there was a gradual improvement. I was able to go home after work and socialise with my housemates (don't ask me how I kept working, I did). I was able to look forward to little things, like cleaning the kitchen, or putting fresh sheets on the bed and enjoying their smell. Sometimes I was even able to feel sad and cry... instead of feeling so numb.
I still have a long way to go. I still feel like I'm under a stinking bell jar 80% of the time. I can't really say I'm experiencing things like joy, or excitement or the full range of emotions yet, but I am aware that my condition was certainly not mild or moderate. I am a girl that had it bad.
But, there is a 20% of clarity, and that's better than nothing.
I have read everything I can on this disease, I have tried various therapies and I maintain a weekly yoga class and when nothing else helps I lie down and try to be calm. There is not a day without some kind of symptom, but I believe that these tablets lifted me out of a hell that was my own.
SJW gave me the ability to want to get out of bed, regardless of the fact that I may have moments of depression throughout the day. I will continue to take it and continue to value my life no matter how heavy the symptoms are. If can look forward to taking my little herbal pill, that's saying a lot, because there was a time when I looked forward to nothing :-)
Love to you all and be STRONG!
You can all get through this, all you need is time.
Posts: 24 | | Registered: Tue 26 Apr 2005 20:27 |
| |
| | "Re(1):5 months in" , Thu 16 Feb 09:22
Look like you had a burnout, I had the same symptoms 6 weeks ago, teeeeerriiiible , i can tell :)
I started SJW 4 days ago, hope it will get me out of it ...
Alex
Posts: 6 | | Registered: Mon 13 Feb 2006 5:2 |
| |  "Re(1):5 months in"
, Sat 29 Oct 11:24
What a lovely post, unsure. Thank you for sharing and you know what, I believe I have suffered stuff like you but for quite some time and though I am older than you I guess I am simply stubborn, proud and quite frankly, hard on myself.
Finally, I decided (won't bore you with details) to act on my health but SJW was a side note, meant for other medicinal reasons which were anti viral. Who would have thought it had more constructive healing in my life.
And I stumbled on that realization by accident. I was going to reserve the SJW tincture for cold/flu stuff and 5htp for the mood swings/depression. Well, recently unable to sleep (insomnia) and though I was only taking 50 mg of 5htp, I went with my intuition and stopped taking it and intuition told me to take a SJW tablet instead.
I am pleased to say, I am able to sleep through the night and seem to dream, recall dreams I imagine or it helps to facilitate them, don't know. Regardless, it is nice to sleep/get REM and dream for in those dreams I can gain clarity on my life and understand my intuition more to set my compass.
Whether I will go back to 5htp is questionable at this point and if I do, the dosage will be reduced and used sporadically. For now, I am quite pleased with SJW and have only used it for a short time. Guess I have the metabolism to act quickly and naturally I don't take other medications that can interfere with absorption, etc.
Love and Strength to you as well...Be Strong and Happy!
Posts: 3 | | Registered: Sun 23 Oct 2005 0:9 |
| | "Re(1):5 months in" , Fri 9 Sep 06:11
Dear Unsure:
Thanks for sharing your experience with us. Even though you are having trouble right now you seem to be a strong person and have the courage to persevere and give support to the other people on this board. I too am taking SJW and find an immense difference in my outlook in only several weeks.
Good luck to you and hang in there. Please let us know how you are doing. Take care!
Posts: 0 | | Registered: Fri 9 Sep 2005 6:5 |
| | "Re(1):5 months in" , Thu 8 Sep 22:11
Hi Unsure-
Thanks for sharing your experience in this nicely written post.
-H2Obuffalo
Posts: 162 | | Registered: Sat 24 May 2003 2:26 |
| | | "Re(2):5 months in" , Tue 27 Dec 04:24
Hi H! :) I read a few of your postings previously and I'm curious...is there a reason you chose SJW over Sam-e or some other supplement?
Posts: 0 | | Registered: Tue 27 Dec 2005 4:21 |
|
|
Home
email/admin 
SJW home 
forum index
