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Why I am here

#1
Hi, I am new here and am really thankful for finding it since I have been struggling with moderate depression for awhile now and reading the posts here motivated me to finally admit I was suffering and needed some extra help.

I am a single dad raising two small daughters on his own, in-between law school and a job, and have been struggling to rebuild a failed relationship with the only woman I ever really loved. All of this has further compounded a depression that I have probably carried with me for years, but would never admit to. Anyway, here I am finally admitting it.

I would probably be severely depressed if it wasn't for a regular practice of yoga and meditation. Those two practices have been greatly beneficial in maintaining balance and well-being. But I was still struggling, although not as much as I have in the past, and said ex-girlfriend, who also suffers from depression as well as anxiety, made me realize I probably have some underlying depression that may need more attention than I was giving it.

I am a big organic/natural living kind of guy and certainly wasn't going to put a drug company's chemicals into my body (I struggled for many years with chronic allergies and sinusitis, until I threw away the allegra, zyrtec, zithro, etc. and picked up an air purifier, hydrogen peroxide, apple cider vinegar and coconut oil only to feel better than I have in my entire life, so I am a big believer that the earth has given us all we need to thrive and that drug companies severe our connection to a natural way of life and only make things worse to protect their profits). I will never forget being handed Effexor after one doctor's visit, then going home and researching it on-line and wondering why anyone would ever put such dangerous junk in their system, and why a doctor would so readily and easily give it out.

Anyway, I was very happy to find this site full of information and people looking for a more natural way to deal with depression.

After reading a lot of stuff here, on Earthclinic and a few other sites I decided to give Rhodiola Rosea a try. I am hoping that with that, the yoga and meditation I will finally be able to listen to stupid song lyrics and not end up in tears, get the sleep that has eluded me for weeks and maybe actually get my appetite and self-esteem back. So far, so good. I am certainly starting to feel improvements in all of those arenas, except maybe the appetite.

Before I go, I gotta put a plug in for cold showers. I know it sounds insane, but I read about it on Earthclinic and decided to give it a try about a week ago and I think it is working.

Take care everyone and thanks for being here.